10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.