10 Random Poker Quotes

• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain