10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.