10 Random Poker Quotes

• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"