10 Random Poker Quotes

• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth