10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Fold and live to fold again
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson