10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• You can't lead a horse to water, but a Donkey will follow you all the way to the River.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]