10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Poker is for loners.
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.