10 Random Poker Quotes

• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."