10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• "No river, no fish."