10 Random Poker Quotes

• Fook the floosh droo!
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--