10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Why not, when some because there are three.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.