10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "No river, no fish."