10 Random Poker Quotes

• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician