10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.