10 Random Poker Quotes

• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• if u play for the thrill u are ill
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.