10 Random Poker Quotes

• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Poker is for loners.
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.