10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977