10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
- "What've you got, Layne?"
"You BEAT."
Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow.
$ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day
2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic
Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
- " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
- Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand.
One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
- Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
- If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
- People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
- "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?"
"Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones."
-Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
- Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
- When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05