10 Random Poker Quotes

• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.