10 Random Poker Quotes

• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.