10 Random Poker Quotes

• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.