10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• it is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time: you can even fool some of the people all the time: but you can't fool al of the peole all the time. -Abraham Lincoln
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.