10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts