10 Random Poker Quotes

• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.