10 Random Poker Quotes

• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"