10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.