10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!