10 Random Poker Quotes

• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986