10 Random Poker Quotes

• Some days you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue.
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."