10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.