10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.