10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Fook the floosh droo!
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth