10 Random Poker Quotes

• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• There's only one concept to understand in poker: at the end walk out with more money than you walked in with.
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)