10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• "No river, no fish."
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-