10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. - unknown
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.