10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.