10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• "you either live by the river or die by the river" why do i always seem to die
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!