10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• The worst hand to have is the second best hand.