10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• "The last time I saw this many Bad Hands was the Shoplifter's Convention in Vegas!" by flintsword
• never rub another mans rhubarb, unless he has the nuts - Jack Nicholson