10 Random Poker Quotes
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More Random Quotes- The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
- If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
- "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses."
Alex Powers
- Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
- I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
- Concentrate.
Don't do anything stupid.
Catch some cards.
----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
- "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
- The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
- Fook the floosh droo!