10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers