10 Random Poker Quotes

• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson