10 Random Poker Quotes

• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "The lucky player is usually the player that knows how much to leave to chance." flintsword
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak
• Never educate a stupid poker player.