10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Fold and live to fold again
• "No river, no fish."
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."