10 Random Poker Quotes

• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• You can't let it get you down when somebody knocks you out of a tournament playing a hand they shouldn't have played. Without these types of players, nobody would win any amount of money, so sometimes you just have to take your medicine. - T.J. Cloutier, Championship Omaha
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• I'm just looking for a way to get outa here.... --------Doyle Brunson, goes all-in WSOP2003