10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• Kiddie games down the street! -- mike matusow
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"