10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"