10 Random Poker Quotes

• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.