10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus. Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)